Friday, November 19, 2010

The Anti-Hipster Manifesto

or: Confessions of an Anti-Hipster; or

The Anti-Hipster Apology; or

Why Would I Drink PBR?;



other working titles: Meaninglessness and its effects on nothing.



Anti-Hipster:
Often mistaken as a hipster, but actually the complete opposite. Anti-hipsters can be difficult to describe because unlike an actual hipster, they do not have definite characteristics. An anti-hipster may have heard the term hipster before, but being unfarmiliar with labels, they wouldn't know what a hipster actually is or how to spot one. While hipsters are actually very unoriginal while claiming to be so very original, every anti-hipster is completely different from another. A hipster shops at Urban Outfitters, an anti-hipster gets their clothes from a number of places. They may make them, find them, steal them, or just buy them from any store they please, because they are not concerned with labels, which actually means they arent anti-hipsters. They probably arent anything. Usually spotted with a group of almost-hipsters or by themselves, the anti-hipster is a rare sighting.-Urban Dictionary




I shall begin by saying that I have quite a few personality quirks. One of these quirks involve the tendency to avoid anything which has suddenly and quickly become popular, be it music or style, recycling or grammar. Usually, such are passing fads that have their brief moment in the sun, only to be tossed away the next day, like (something that does that). It's not that I think that whatever the fad may be is bad, it's that I just don't want to get carried away with whatever everybody else thinks is cool; I don't care how talented Maroon 5 is, I will resist all my friends who say they're so great, if only to be a contrast to all of the hype.

But this isn't about Maroon 5 (as much as you would like it to be). The point is, I avoid fads like the plague. If the plague were popular (again), I would avoid it. And throughout the years, this attitude has served me well:

-I didn't buy a house when everyone was doing that and, as I understand it, buying houses caused the economy to collapse.

-I never hated the Dixie Chicks. I don't know that there is a positive result of this, but whatever.


More recently, I have found that my narrative has lent itself to living amongst, what society has termed, "Hipsters." As a result, many of my actions are reactionary to what could be called the Hipster-movement. A counter-culture to the counter culture.


This led to a friend of mine asking a very interesting question a few weeks ago:

Him: Hey, (my name), Did you know that you were a hipster?

Me: Actually, yes. I just figured it out last week.




I had come to such a realization purely by accident. I mean, the definition of a hipster is somewhat subjective and fickle, but here is a snippet of urbandictionary.com's take on it:


Hipsters are a subculture of men and women typically in their 20's and 30's that value independent thinking, counter-culture, progressive politics, an appreciation of art and indie-rock, creativity, intelligence, and witty banter. 1



Conversely, I value: dependent thinking, counter to the counter-culture, regressive politics, depreciation of art and indie-rock, ineptitude, obtuseness and mundane conversation.

But essentially, I am just embracing an alternative viewpoint for the sake of being alternative. Which is a defining characteristic of hipsters. It was only a matter of time until their clothing, music, and grammar caught up to me.

Music is a prime example. I will generally give music a chance. I will listen to anything that the "music snobs" deem offensive or unworthy. Anything except what they are currently listening to. I won't listen to that. And even when I feel like I've gotten better- listening to Arcade Fire (by the way, what is that?) and Sufjan (not a name), because I shouldn't let what others do effect me- I don't care what they think, etc. And that is a perfectly hipster reaction.

This goes along with my (non-apple) computer and (non-iphone) phone. These stereotypical hipster accessories I avoid. But if a real hipster found themselves in a culture where everybody had iphones (as I do), would they own them? Probably not.

The real trick, I think is to prove someone isn't a hipster. Next time you see someone wearing a Wal-Mart t-shirt and listening to Joel Osteen and you think he's behind the times, think again: He's just a hipster being ironic.